by Jacopo della Quercia

In the name of the most awesome and individual Man Cave Daily: Be it known to all, and everyone whom it may concern, or to whom in any manner it has affected—i.e., everyone—that for many years past, October 24 was and remains…

Wonder Race

Chartres Cathedral is dedicated in 1260, which is a big deal because it would later make an appearance in Age of Empires II: The Age of Kings as the wonder for the Franks.

Only a few hundred years more to go until they win

Dead to Righteous

Sultan Saif ad-Din Qutuz of Egypt, hero of the spectacular Battle of Ain Jalut, is assassinated in 1260 while returning home to Cairo. He died one of the most popular sultans who ever lived and one of the few people in history to decisively defeat the Mongols on the battlefield.

See this? Qutuz somehow defeated that

End of Part I

The Treaty of Brétigny is ratified in 1360, ending the first period of the Hundred Years’ War. The war would eventually continue for another 93 years.

How a war led by teenage farmers lasted a Hundred Years we’ll never understand 

War and Peaces

The treaties of Osnabrück and Münster, better known as the Peace of Westphalia, are signed, ending the Thirty Years’ War and the Eighty Years’ War. Pope Innocent X described the treaty as “null, void, invalid, iniquitous, unjust, damnable, reprobate, inane, empty of meaning and effect for all time.”

Apparently, everyone wore a Guy Fawkes mask to the occasion

GOAL!!!

Sheffield F.C., “the world’s first football club,” is founded in 1857 at Sheffield, England.

We’re guessing they celebrated with a riot

Exit Stage Left

Harry Houdini performs his last performance at the Garrick Theatre in Detroit, Michigan in 1926. Sucker-punched (and suffering appendicitis), he dies a few days later on Halloween.

That, or he just freaking disappeared

“Thar she blows [up]”

The Japanese aircraft carrier Zuikaku and battleship Musashi are sunk during the epic Battle of Leyte Gulf in 1944.

Whatever that thing is, it sure as hell looks fun to smash

Unite the Clans

The Charter of the United Nations, signed on June 26, 1945, took effect on October 24 that year. The day would later be recognized by the UN General Assembly and around the world as United Nations Day.

Happy birthday, everyone except the Vatican!

Unbelievable, October 24. After reading what you accomplished in one day, we feel less guilty about spending half of ours on the Internet.

Burn, baby, burn! …Oh God! Not literally!

Jacopo della Quercia is a man of many talents who somehow eluded death in 1438. He can regularly be found at Cracked and on Twitter @Jacopo_della_Q. 

Whirl, baby, whirl!

Check out Jacopo’s other Badass Days in History: October 9 and October 17.