Make Your Pudding…Twerk?
Twerking. We all love it. Some of us even do it, secretly, in our rooms, wishing for just one minute we could feel pretty. Sigh…
This totally not overblown cultural phenomenon has become so prevalent that even our delicious colloidal suspension confectionary desserts are getting in on the craze. Naturally, this has something to do with Japan, which is the country where pornography, horror, and innocence are almost indistinguishable. And that’s not pejorative; we’re just jealous of Japan’s advanced psychosexual grapholinguistic technology. Also, that nation has robots, so they must be more advanced than we. Anyway, here’s your daily dose of WTF, courtesy of butt-shakin’ pudding: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=QHw3ieSEBlM#t=152
Va va va voom and vo doh di oh do! This pudding’s ready to go, yo! Look at that tempting way it jiggles and shakes, and demands you give it the attention its father never did. Why, any second, a sleazy, short guy in an Armani Exchange shirt is going to appear behind that pudding and grind his crotch into it like it was the cure for genital warts. Then the pudding’s going to do that subtle look over its shoulder that ladies do when they want to figure out if the alien groin rubbing up on them belongs to a cute guy. Then a bouncer made of pudding is going to show up and throw out the sleazy guy, because sometimes, just sometimes…there’s justice in this crazy world of ours. Not enough justice to prevent twerking pudding from becoming a thing, but still.