TV/Movie Mashups So Crazy They Just Might Work

In a parallel universe inside of an infinite space and time, there is a world where anything is possible. Imagine for a moment that inside of this world is a place where our favorite shows and movies have combined to make the ultimate hybrid. What would they look like? How would it even work? Here are some examples…

Jurassic Parks and Recreation

After an eccentric billionaire finds a way to bring dinosaurs back to life, he enlists the help of a quirky staff to open his theme park. However when a tropical storm threatens the integrity and security of the park, this rag-tag group of misfits goes on a series of heartfelt misadventures to regain public favor. Even through the ups and downs of their interpersonal relationships, they do their best to make sure that the park is restored and no one gets brutally eaten. However on this island, the only thing more powerful than nature is the power of friendship. And velociraptors.

'We're going to turn this dump into a park, or at least fill it with water and terrifying dinosaurs."

‘We’re going to turn this dump into a park, or at least fill it with water and terrifying dinosaurs.”

Ender’s Game of Thrones

Space Winter is coming. In a time where different alien races all vie for total control of the universe, one planet holds the key to victory. It is a child who’s mind is the most masterful weapon, but he keeps getting distracted by so much space nudity. As new heroes emerge and major other characters unexpectedly die, no one is safe. It seems as though an all out war is imminent and as the forces grow, alliances are made through secret betrayals. Yet when all is said and done, will humanity be restored? Or is it one giant game where you either win, or scream about how nothing is fair and people keep dying and the books won’t even be finished before the author dies. It all lies within the hands of a child.

enter the zoetrope Thinkstock

This is either the best movie ever or the cover of a math textbook.

Mad Max Men

In a post apocalyptic future, a roving gang of well dress men with slicked back hair travel the countryside pitching ideas to make copious amounts of money. As they encounter violent, lawless societies with access to war-like weaponry, these men drink, smoke, kill, conspire to cheat on their wives and backstab each other all in the name of getting credit for promotions and ideas.

However the longer they journey, the more secrets are revealed which shed light on the characters that seemed so transparent. The idea of right and wrong is questioned and the only true solution to their problems is a cage where two men enter, and one man leaves as a killer…pitch man.

"What you call heroism is invented by guys like me to sell gasoline."

“What you call heroism is invented by guys like me to sell gasoline.”

The New Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

When a quirky, socially awkward girl with short bangs moves in with 3 guys, friendships, dynamics, and allegiances get called in to question. Promising not to get involved with any of them, the apartment gets thrown in to a tizzy when this girl starts bringing home an older new gentleman. Suddenly, everyone seems to be harboring a dark secret and no one is who they appear to be. In this off beat, fun, and morally corrupt tale of espionage while learning to live with goofball roommates, can this crew get past their differences and learn to function as a unit? Or will someone be tortured until it is revealed that love and truth are not mutually exclusive?

Ballet is totally metal.

Interesting fact: All ballerinas are hackers, though not all hackers are ballerinas.

Breaking Bad News Bears

When a high school teacher gets delivered the news that he is dying, he decides to radically alter his life…by coaching a little league team. In order to pay off the massive medical bills he uses his team as a front to sell homemade drugs, but when a rival team threatens to expose the truth it sets in motion a chain of disastrous events. Personal lives begin to crumble, parents start to catch on, spouses realize they’ve been bombarded with lies, and a friend chicken company turns out to be owned by a drug kingpin/rival coach. The only way to fight back is through a series of trick plays in the big game so everyone learns valuable life lessons about being down, but never out. And also that saying no to drugs makes life a whole lot less complicated.

"Yo, Mr. White--put me in! I'm totally cranked to play!"

“Yo, Mr. White–put me in! I’m totally cranked to play!”

Tyler Paterson is a Chicago native that tours the country with his comedy band. He loves ghost hunting and writing music. But not writing music about ghost hunting.

Tyler chronicled more alternate histories that might have been in Thank Goodness They Failed!

Pepper Potts quits her day job.

Pepper Potts quits her day job.

More from W. Tyler Paterson

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