A Day in the Life of…Spider-Man

Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a spider can, including bite his opponent to dissolve them from the inside. No? Okay, well, most everything else. But Peter Parker’s a busy guy, between classes at Empire University, dating not one but two brainy models, and getting paid almost as much for every selfie he takes as Kim Kardashian does. What does he do with his limited downtime? We followed the fearless photojournalist to find out.

How did we elude his infallible spider-sense? Easy! We just put on this super sneaky spy suit synthesized from space-age symbiote! Turns out ol’ Peter Parker can’t detect you when you’re wearing one of these ba…

These b….

Th–th–thes–OH GOD, IT IS INSIDE OUR THOUGHTS. GET IT OUT! Kill it with fire! It is whispering dreams of loneliness among the stars! It–it wants to eat Parker’s brains so he can be part of it forever!

While we’re dealing with this venomous situation, please enjoy the chronology below.

All this while Green Goblin's throwing pumpkin bombs at your head.

All this while Green Goblin’s throwing pumpkin bombs at your head.

Lesser parties get medieval. This one went full Renaissance

Lesser parties get medieval. This one went full Renaissance.

Jacopo della Quercia is a man of many talents who somehow eluded death in 1438. He can regularly be found at Cracked and on Twitter @Jacopo_della_Q
Does anyone else hear fiddling?

Does anyone else hear fiddling?

Jacopo is MCD’s resident historian and keeper of the badass flame. Check out This Badass Day in History: October 30 and This Badass Day in History: October 9.

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