Neighbors. We all have them. We don’t always like them. That’s why we invested in the Frost Good Fencing company, so we never have to talk to our neighbors and answer ten weird questions like “Have you seen my cat?” and “What are you cooking?” Civilization encroaches and them townie-folks can’t understand the necessities of living off the land, foraging yourself, and collecting vital nutrients from kitty stew. Goldurn gigglypantsin’ city slickers tryin’ ta impose their law on OUR mountain! If that cat crosses onto your land, he’s your property, dagnabbit! It’s the American wa–
Oh, NGHBRS? Yeah, great band. What? Here? Oh oh oh, we totally misinterpreted that one. Okay, it seems WE’RE asking the questions here, and posing them to the guys keeping the rock in rock ‘n’ roll. That takes a lot of work! So much that it took the whole band to answer this interview, and they still had to boogie one question early. Even Man Cave’s needs must yield to the demands of the tour, which we can respect. So if you want to ask them the tenth question yourself, corner them when they play the Bowery Ballroom in NYC tomorrow, or Pittsburgh after that, or Columbus after that.
1) Man Cave Daily: What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever seen?
NGHBRS: An elderly woman standing naked in the men’s bathroom of a Spanish-Italian restaurant. Definitely strange.
2) MCD: What person (living or dead) would you duel, and what’s your choice of weapon?
NGHBRS: Genghis Khan with a samurai sword.
3) MCD: What’s the worst date you’ve had?
NGHBRS: I found out, the hard way, that a girl had severe acid reflux after I took her to grab a slice of pizza, and she threw up EVERYWHERE.
4) MCD: What’s the most annoying thing a person can do?
NGHBRS: Ask “You still doin that band thing?”
5) MCD: What’s the hardest you’ve ever laughed?
NGHBRS: When we covered Justin Bieber’s song “Baby” at a children’s summer camp. Let’s just say it got pretty rowdy.
6) MCD: What’s a piece of pop culture you love but no one else remembers? (song, TV show, commercial, book, etc.)
NGHBRS: Big Wolf on Campus
7) MCD: Would you rather encounter a ghost, aliens, or Bigfoot? Why?
NGHBRS: Bigfoot because I may at some point become a ghost and us humans would be considered extraterrestrial (aliens) to those which we consider aliens. In other words, I will never be Bigfoot.
8) MCD: What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?
NGHBRS: A burp.
9) MCD: What job would you be terrible at, and why?
NGHBRS: I would be awful as a character dressed up outside of a store, to attract customers. I would be way to embarrassed to do any sort of marketing/ advertising for the store. Ever since I was a kid, I always felt bad for people I saw working those jobs. The clown standing in front of your mattress store is not going to convince me to buy a mattress from you, it’s creepy.
Brendan McGinley is editor round these parts when not writing comics or Cracked columns. You can say a neighborly hello to him on Twitter @BrendanMcGinley. You’d probably enjoy his supervillain comic Heist, if you’re a fan of tarnished souls and brutal retribution.
Want more solid music? We dared you to go Beyond Eve 6: an Interview with Max Collins.