Pictured: turtle power  (credit: Thinkstock)

The Truth Behind the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Weapons

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: proof that you can make millions of dollars by throwing darts at a dictionary, as long as you cross out all the unradical words and replace darts with ninja stars. In […]

Writers–08/06/2014

Tackle gear is appropriate everywhere except for weddings and closed-casket funerals. These are the things you learn in such books!

Review: ‘Mantiques: A Manly Guide to Cool Stuff’

Unless you’re the type of guy who has a wardrobe that includes at least one white seersucker suit and enjoys saying things like “how droll…” in casual conversation, telling your buddies that you plan on […]

Writers–08/04/2014

"Haha I'm not touching youuuu..."

A Day in the Life of…Spider-Man

Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a spider can, including bite his opponent to dissolve them from the inside. No? Okay, well, most everything else. But Peter Parker’s a busy guy, between classes at Empire University, dating not one […]

08/01/2014

Science MUST know the effects of doing science drunkenly!

What’s the Focal Length of Whiskey?

People talk about beer goggles, but goggles are meant to protect those working in dangerous situations with a lot of dirt and liquid. Which can be tremendous fun. But they still restrict your view of […]

Writers–07/31/2014

Everyone's wondering if Marvel overreached with this movie for having such weird source material, and we're just sitting here remembering when everybody predicted the same thing for "300" and "Sin City."

What You Don’t Need to Know About the Guardians of the Galaxy

This week you’ll see many articles explaining what you need to know about the Guardians of the Galaxy before seeing the movie. Which is nonsense. All you need to know is the name, and how […]

Writers–07/29/2014

We're going to start saying this to everyone who's sad regardless of circumstances.

The Five Stages of Hair Loss

A life lived well is a life that must consolidate the sadder side of existence. Loss. Heartbreak. Michael Bay. But of all the various losses a man can suffer, there is none so glaringly obvious […]

Writers–07/28/2014

Solved: why bulls get angry at the color red. 
(Yeah, we know, bulls are colorblind, ya spoilsport...)

5 Fun Cocktails For International Tequila Day

Tequila has famous cocktails in the same way Julius Caesar had a famous friend called Brutus – a glorious power betrayed and destroyed by those meant to help serve it. The true Margarita has gone […]

Writers–07/24/2014

<em(courtesy of Universal Pictures)

‘The Purge: Anarchy’ Producer Jason Blum

The movie Saw came out just under ten years ago, and since then, horror fans have had a huge variety of small-budget, viscerally terrifying movies to force their girlfriends to watch with them. Jason Blum […]

07/22/2014

Too much said, even.

‘Sharknado': The Worst Worst Movie Ever Made

Sharknado is getting a sequel. It must be stopped. Because it’s worse than the worst movie ever made. They could film the ten-thousandth zombie movie, fulfilling an ancient prophecy to resurrect the rotting god of […]

07/14/2014

Vroom vroom! Make way for Professor Fun!

A Day in the Life of…Nikola Tesla

graphic by Brendan McGinley Nikola Tesla was, as per his Wikipedia entry, “a was a Serbian-American inventor, electrical engineer, mechanical engineer, and futurist,” but they forget to include his most popular roles: supergenius, heartthrob, and […]

07/10/2014

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