Father’s Day Gift Ideas from Strippers

We have no idea what to get dad for Father's Day. If we go by what he gave us for our birthday when he remembered it, he'd get Twizzlers and a pack of Camel Lights. So we did what we always do: we shut up and let the strippers call the shots.
We asked the ladies of Show Palace in Queens, the only strip club we know of that has a Father's Day special, what we should get pop. Several suggested "Me!" but dad's not worth that much. Here's what they came up with instead...
We have no idea what to get dad for Father's Day. If we go by what he gave us for our birthday when he remembered it, he'd get Twizzlers and a pack of Camel Lights. So we did what we always do: we shut up and let the strippers call the shots.
Prepare for a deluge of dad jokes about "5-wood" and "The 19th hole" and something about "in the rough."
"A fake golf outing so he can come spend the day with us."
You're not funny, dad.
Prepare for a deluge of dad jokes about "5-wood" and "The 19th hole" and something about "in the rough."
They also suggested "Makeup remover to get the stripper glitter off."
"Cologne so he can hide our smell." They also suggested "Makeup remover to get the stripper glitter off."
Darlin', no offense, but if he needs Viagra in here, it'll probably kill him to take it.
"Viagra. ...What?" Darlin', no offense, but if he needs Viagra in here, it'll probably kill him to take it.
Whoa whoa whoa -- hold up. There are FIVES now?
"A stack of $1s or $5s if you’re a high roller" Whoa whoa whoa -- hold up. There are FIVES now?
Sound advice.
"Get daddy a pair of pants with deep pockets." Sound advice.
Remember that time we applied rigorous scientific analysis to determining if names belonged to Beanie Babies or Strippers?
Delve deeper...
Go ahead and click. Dad would want you to.
Remember that time we applied rigorous scientific analysis to determining if names belonged to Beanie Babies or Strippers?
View Comments

Latest Galleries

Ten Weird Questions with "Totally Busted" hostess Erika Jordan
Gang of Harley Quinns is Nerd Heaven
Jen Wilke Bonus Gallery
Iryna Ivanova Bonus Gallery
Warriors Dancers Amira & Patrisha Bonus Gallery
Getting Used to America: Ask Iryna Ivanova
Alli Alberts Bonus Gallery!
Carmen Bourseau Bonus Pics
blog comments powered by Disqus